Discover & Set Your Intent

Firstly – here is the full process in its 3 simple steps:

Step 1 asks you to decide:

• what it is you want to focus on,
• or you want to notice more often,
• or what you might want to change.

I’ve given you single word to name each intent type: Meaning, Mindstate, Mindset or Message.

Now I’m guessing that if you’re here reading this conversation, you may already have an inkling as to what you want to make the subject of your mini-experience. If you do – fab!

AND – here is how to make sure you’ve got the right thing – i.e. the right problem worth solving right now. This means not only identifying what to work on and naming it correctly, but also ensuring that you’re actually ready and willing to do something about it.

If you gloss over any one of these factors you compromise your chances of success. And conversely, spending a little more attention at this step – being honest with yourself – will set you up ahead of the game before you’ve even begun.

Now – think of what brought you here today? Why were you intrigued by the concept of knowing how to use your jewelry as a catalyst to show up in your full colour and shine?

• Do you feel you need more *meaning in your life?
• Is it that certain *mindstates sometimes undermine how you show up in some situations?
  • Mindstate in this context => temporary mental/emotional condition that affects momentary reactions. How you’re feeling or thinking at a given moment. It fluctuates depending on circumstances, environment, or immediate experiences, influencing short-term reactions and behaviors.
• Do you wish to shift a *mindset about something you do repeatedly – so you can move on to a different (maybe better) phase in life?
  • Mindset in this context => long-lasting mental framework that shapes consistent behavior. Refers to a person’s established set of beliefs, attitudes, or ways of thinking. It is more long-term and shapes how we interpret the world, approach challenges, and make decisions over time. Think of it as the mental framework that influences our consistent behavior and perceptions.
• Or is it a *message you want to feel more often – perhaps a hidden message to yourself that empowers you to show up more fully for yourself, for someone or something? For example, wanting to feel more confident in a corporate meeting situation. Or to feel more self-assured on a first date.

*these are my 4Ms of behaviour shift – or the four categories of behaviour concepts which you could choose to work on.

If one of the above Ms stands out for you, here are two simple ways to test if they’re the right things to focus on at the moment (because sometimes even though things are important on the whole, they’re not salient right now, which just means you’ll find a way to deprioritise them and then end up disappointing yourself).

Test A: The Urgency Test

Ask yourself: On a scale of 1 to 10 – how urgent do you feel is the thing you selected to work on?

If you said an 8 or above – fab you’re on the right scent so far.

For a 7 or below – assess what is more urgent for you at the moment. Or consider why this thing is not urgent enough – what’s in your way (perceived or real obstacle/s)?

Test B: The 5 Times WHY Test

On a blank paper, write down the answer to the question: Why is it important for me to work on this thing now?

Then layer on the same question on to the preceding answer four more times. Each subsequent answer has to build on to the previous one, and you can’t answer with the same reason twice.

For example: If I said I want to work on being more confident when speaking to my audience, my first why answer might be: Because I want to intrigue and inspire more women to take the time to understand themselves deeper, and that will enable them to use their jewelry to activate their full life power – to get more meaning and joy from their day.

On the second round my why question would be: Why is it important that I inspire women to understand themselves better and use their jewelry to live more fully?

My answer could then be: Because the better they know themselves, by using this fun method to activate themselves in the way the feel the need – the more actively they shape their life path and the enjoyment of the things they do.

Then my third level answer may be: Because the more they live in their full colour and shine, the more they give others around them the affective permission to also live fully. We all get better, because each one of us feels better and lives with more meaning.

My ultimate deeply emotional – or Powerhouse Why (as I call it) is: Understanding yourself allows you to be kinder to you. To be more fluid with what life throws at you and to direct your attention to things that give you meaning and relief from unnecessary abrasions. That makes you a much more colourful and shiny human. Because, when you feel more joy – you bring more joy to those around you. Life gets lighter – a little :o) And I want to catalyse this process in each person I reach on my journey.

How to Tell You Have it Ready

I hope you don’t mind my little segue – but it illustrates the point. By the time you’ve gone five layers deep into your WHY, you should have at least two priceless pieces of info about what you’re about to do:

• Firstly – you should have your deep emotional Powerhouse WHY for wanting to change. So when you’re challenged, your WHY will hold you on course. If you have that WHY – each time you read it you should get the same emotional hit – reliably.
• And secondly – this line of questioning will give you ideas of the underlying potential stumbling blocks or self-deception stories you may hold about this thing you want to change. In some cases you might even discover this is not the RPWSRN (the right problem worth solving right now). And if you find that your ‘thing’ is KO before you start – that’s also OK. It’s much easier and less damaging to your self-efficacy to fold now and start with a new idea, then to go ahead with a weak idea, make the effort, fail (not because of the quality of effort) and give up prematurely…

Right – now do the two tests above.

Finally (for this step), when you have the right thing to focus on – express it in one neat and clear sentence. Then in a second sentence express your powerhouse why.

In my example above this may look something like so:

I want to become a more confident speaker. This will allow me to reach more women more affectively, to help activate them to express themselves more fully through their jewelry style, which in turn will empower them to live with more joy and more meaning, appreciating how amazing each one is and how much they have to contribute to the collective.

When you’re happy with your two sentences – let’s move to step 2.

No – wait! I have a bonus Test 3 for you – IF you choose to give yourself more power for when you start to implement this method. Sure you can choose to skip this step, but trust me it’s 3-5 extra minutes well spent. It’s in the moments we’re challenged that our prep work steps in to ‘have our back’.

Bonus Success Points – Test 3

Very honestly:

• for your intent statement above, write down 3 ways in which you know you’re guaranteed to feel you’ve succeed.
• then similarly – list 3 ways you’re guaranteed to feel you failed.

Making those lists gives you ways to stay even more aware of the responses you want to re-wire. And it gives your mind (your Reticular Activating System to be more specific) a ‘scent’ to look for things you need on your road to success, and things to avoid.

Ready to move to Step 2…